Thursday, February 18, 2010

Dude pulled a Shuster

wikipedia vandalism:
John Shuster (born November 3, 1982, died February 18, 2010) is an American curler from Chisholm, Minnesota and Olympic medalist. Nicknamed "The Largest Choke Artist Alive", Shuster distracts his opponents with horrible shots and general terrible overall play. He is known for folding under pressure situations and never making clutch, let alone easy, shots. He received a bronze medal at the 2006 Winter Olympics in Torino.[1]

He participated on the American team at the 2003, 2005, 2006 and 2009 World Curling Championships.


Shuster curls out of the Duluth Curling Club. As a young boy Shuster was interested in other sports, such as golf and baseball. During the memorable 1996 Masters event, he served as a caddy for Greg Norman.

Shuster won the 2010 United States Olympic Curling Trials and is representing the United States at the 2010 Olympic Games in Vancouver.

At the 2009 Curling World Championships in Moncton, Canada John Shuster and his team finished in fifth place. They ended the Round Robin portion in a tie for the playoffs; however, they lost to Team Norway in the tiebreaker.

In a side note, in 2008 Shuster attempted to commit suicide. Unsurprisingly to those who know him and have watched him play, he failed at the attempt; Shuster used a gun and once again completely messed up the shot.

Shuster's 2005 college roommate stated that he only bought Shuster a shot once. He said that after the first attempt, he never trusted Shuster with a shot ever again.

Shuster has come to be known as the biggest choke artist of the 2010 Winter Olympics, and is the lone reason the USA curling team has not won a single game this Olympics.


Upon John's pathetic performance at the 2010 games, he has decided to retire from the sport. And an hero.


Shuster said he draws inspiration from Bill Buckner, Brad Lidge, Scott Norwood, and the city of Cleveland.

He currently works as a quality control specialist for Toyota.

21 comments:

DannyNoonan said...

I just heard they benched him.

Eric said...

If true it also explains why Toyotas are getting fixed

Eric said...

No place else to put this really.

The Canadian chick uniforms are hot.

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