This is brilliant.
(H/T Tango)
1 day ago
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Tim Tebow? Jesus Christ…
This column is amazingly bad to the point that I do not know if it is serious or not. I believe it is because it contains facts that are not facts. (Or as I call them, "lies".) Good satire uses the truth to its advantage. This is just tripe. Assuming it is serious, it's almost certainly the worst thing ever published at Fanhouse.
Look, I suppose there is some outside shot that Tim Tebow will succeed in the NFL. Maybe his big frame will let him hang in the pocket like Roethlisberger and allow his receivers extra time to get open (and extra time for his terribly slow delivery). Maybe he continues to be a weapon running the ball. It could happen.
But it probably won’t.
And anyone who thinks it will based on a few Brandon Lloyd circus catches against one of the worst pass defenses in the league is just delusional. Tebow completed just over half his passes for a lot of yards based on a few bombs that clicked. He had 1 TD and 1 pick, and added a rushing TD (although he only averaged 2.7 ypc). This was not some stellar performance, and pretending it was is just silly. Matt Cassel (201, 3 TDs, 0 picks) and David Garrard (342, 2 TDs, 0 picks) tore this team up. Mark Sanchez, who is apparently quite bad at football, looked like John Elway against Houston (315, 3TDs, 1 Pick). Donovan McNabb threw for 426 yards and a TD against them (no picks). Kerry Collins and Bruce Gradkowski put up games that were at least the equal of Tebow.
On Sunday, Tebow completed 55% of his passes. Only one other QB has completed as low a percentage as Tebow against the Texans this year: Rusty Smith. The Texans have allowed a QB to complete at least 65% of his passes on 8 occasions this year, and have allowed a QB to complete 70% of his passes 5 times. Tebow threw 1 pick and 1 TD. The only other QBs to not have a positive TD/Int ratio against the Texans are Bruce Gradkowski and Rusty Smith. The only other QBs to not throw at least 2 TD passes against the Texans are McNabb (who threw for 426 yards and no picks) and Rusty Smith.
It is difficult to oversell just how bad the Texans secondary was this year. That is what makes this piece of fanboy nonsense so completely terrible.
At the 2009 World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party, I bought and wore a teal and white, Jacksonville Jaguar colors, "Draft Tebow" T-shirt. The shirt had been for sale at a local Walgreen's -- perhaps the first time Walgreen's had been directly complicit in an NCAA violation -- and I wore it at the Georgia-Florida game to gauge fan reaction. (Read that column here.)
At that time Tebow and Florida were the defending national champions and how Tebow projected as an NFL quarterback was the single most-debated issue in the Southeastern Conference. Throw open the phone lines beneath the Mason-Dixon line and you could take calls for hours, everyone had an opinion.
Generally, the Tebow haters, and they were legion, would argue that his football glory was short-lived. That he could never win a football game in the NFL. That he would have to change positions to tight end or fullback. That Tim Tebow was a system quarterback who had no future at the position.
Just to distinguish myself as a "non-hater", I’d like to point something out. Tim Tebow’s college stats, in a vaccuum, absolutely look like they should translate to NFL success. He started a lot of games and he had a very high completion percentage. We’re not talking about a Kyle Boller-esque combine darling here.
The reasons that people are skeptical of Tebow are almost entirely based on scouting.
He has a funky delivery (and not in the good, Philip Rivers way), and he has trouble with the accuracy of certain throws. He was bigger than many college linebackers (but not professional linebackers), and he’s not terribly fast. And people overrate him because of his stupid moralizing. OK, so maybe I’m a bit of a hater.
Anyway, Tebow sort of reminds me of Ron Dayne. I think most people knew that Dayne wouldn’t succeed as a pro. He was just too slow, and his size advantage would only work in college. He had physical gifts, they just stopped working when the competition got better. Anyway…
I always argued otherwise, thinking back to the lasers I'd seen a freshman Tebow throwing in warm-ups at the Swamp in 2006. I had faith in Tebow's pro potential, argued that any team that didn't consider drafting him was foolish. And after I saw Tebow dismantle the Sugar Bowl record books en route to a 31-for-35 passing performance for 482 yards in a romp over Cincinnati. He also tossed in 51 yards rushing.
How could anyone have any doubts?
Cincinnati? Dude, have you seen the Big East lately? That Cinci team allowed Illinois to score 39 points. Pitt scored 44 on them. An unranked UConn team scored 45 on them. I would hope that Tim Tebow would at least put up better numbers than Juice Williams.
But Tebow's domination of the Sugar Bowl record book was in the future on that October day at the Cocktail Party. On that day Florida fans saw the Draft Tebow shirt and did the Gator chomp. They'd seen the Tebow, had faith in his ability to overcome any challenge.
These were in the ancient days before Tebow's statue was complete in Gainesville and before there was a plaque outside the wall featuring the speech Tebow gave after the loss to Ole Miss. "The Promise." But Georgia fans were not as enamored of Tebow. "He's a f---- fullback," screamed one fan. "He's a tight end," screamed another. "Tebow's a f---- p--y," catcalled an elegant female Bulldog.
Love him or hate him, already, Tebow was legend.
None of this has anything to do with Tebow’s ability to play in the pros. We know about all of this garbage. Announcers talked about nothing else during every Florida broadcast. The auditory fellatio directed at Tebow by announcers was also legend.
The question remained: would Tebow's game translate at the next level? Could he become a winning quarterback in the NFL? His jerseys flew off the shelf, becoming the best-selling jersey in the NFL. But Tebow stayed on the sideline. Then the head coach who'd risked his coaching future on drafting him, Josh McDaniels, was fired. At long last, Tebow took the field.
I would just like to point out that Kyle Orton actually played pretty well, especially early. And it’s quite possible that had the Broncos stayed healthy, and not been run by morons, or had some kind of defense, that Orton could very well have kept it up. Later, we will be talking about "300 yard games" for no good reason. Just keep in mind that Orton threw for over 300 yards in 4 of the Broncos first 5 games this year.
He lost his first game as a starter, against the Oakland Raiders,
8/16 for 138 yards and 1 TD. Half of those went to Brandon Lloyd.
but on Sunday Tebow took the field as a starter for a second time. And Tim Tebow vanquished the doubters who claimed he'd never be a winning quarterback at the NFL level.
By completing just over 50% of his passes against the worst secondary in the NFL. Well, I’m silenced. Oh, wait, no I’m not, because I watch NFL games and know about the Texans and follow Steph Stradley on Twitter.
Throwing for 308 yards against the Houston Texas, Tebow rallied his Denver Broncos team from a 17-0, second-half deficit and snatched a victory many never believed would come, a 24-23 triumph.
Really? Houston is basically famous for blowing second-half leads at this point. They’ve blown some truly amazing leads. They lost on a pick-6 in OT 2 weeks before this. 3 weeks ago they blew a big lead against the Eagles. In week 11 they let the Jets go all the way down the field with no timeouts and under a minute to go in only 2 plays to blow what should have been a sure victory.
The Texans do this all the time.
It wasn't just that Tebow won, it's the fact that his game clearly translates to the next level.
Did he improve his accuracy? Speed up his delivery?
Tebow's emotional embrace of the gridiron, his infectious enthusiasm, it's all there, working on an NFL sideline just like it worked in college. Just the way that his critics long contended it wouldn't. The anti-Tebow contingent was flat out wrong, but they won't admit it yet.
Oh. So…he’s a cheerleader. I’m glad Brandon Lloyd started playing better after Tebow started inspiring him. Oh, wait, he was awesome even when the kind of mopey-looking Neckbeard was QB. So, who is being enthused by Tebow exactly?
Already, the Tebow haters are retrenching their criticisms now that he is a winning quarterback in the NFL.
Because he won a game? Like, 1 game? So John Skelton is also a “Winning Quarterback”?
Tebow, in throwing for 300 yards in just his second start as a rookie, has managed a feat that neither Peyton nor Eli Manning could accomplish in their rookie seasons.
Eli Manning, nice QB, not that great. Peyton Manning was drafted #1 overall. When you are drafted #1 overall the team that drafts you is terrible as a rule (barring a trade, I suppose). Also, the Texans secondary doesn’t come around very often, and as previously pointed out, everyone has torched them. Also, raw yardage is a stupid measure.
There must be a reason why they were wrong. The Tebow haters are circling, nervous, still unwilling to give up the hateful fight. They point to the Houston Texans' pass defense, currently ranked 32nd in the league.
Uhm..yes. Though I’m not sure last really captures their terribleness completely. I mean, you can’t be worse than 32nd. You can’t fall off the floor, as they say.
Want to read a whole bunch of straw man arguments all in a row?
The same people who said that Tebow would never win an NFL game,
Basically, no one said this. Tons of awful QBs have “won” NFL games.
wring their hands and argue that this is too small of a sample size to prove anything.
Yes, one game is too small of a sample size to prove anything. That is correct. But they will not “wring their hands” as they are correct.
And even if it does prove anything, the Texans are awful. So what, you know, if the Broncos are also awful. That's why the Texans were favored to win this game.
No , no, no. The Texans are not awful. The Texans’ offense is very good. This is why the Texans are in almost every game they play. Their defense, however, is so bad that even Tim Tebow looked OK against it.
Of course, those Tebow haters have already been proven wrong so now they have to move their targets, have to argue that Tebow can't do it again.
Now I'm not really not sure if this is parody or not. I’m not that acquainted with Clay Travis's writing, but this sounds so meatball-y that it is difficult to believe it was published. Actually, I take that back. This is the kind of tripe I might expect from an old-timey columnist, so I guess my main surprise is that an online magazine published this. It might be Tebow-baiting.
When he does, they'll argue that he can't beat a team with a winning record, that he can't beat a 3-4 defense, that he can't win a playoff game, that he can't win a Super Bowl. You get the picture. Tebow haters gonna hate. And keep shifting the argument every time Tebow proves them wrong. Tebow haters will begin every sentence with, "Yeah, but..."
You did see his game against the Raiders last week, right? Where he completed 8 passes? And it was only the Raiders. I mean, we’re dealing with a small sample size here to start, the least you could do is not ignore half of the sample size.
But every time they adjust their argument Tebow moves further down the field, powering through his haters like they stood between him and the goal line. Already the college debate that lasted for three years -- could Tebow win in the NFL?-- has shifted to, how many games can Tebow win in the NFL? The answer? A ton. Make no mistake about it, quarterbacks passing for 300 yards in their rookie season are rare, no matter who the NFL competition is.
This is not true, and it is not true that 300 yard games against the Texans are rare. And “300 yards” is one of those annoying, arbitrary round number bench marks. Sticking to the 300 yard thing ignores that fact that Tebow wasn’t very accurate in this game, and was actually picked off by a defense that only had 8 non-Rusty interceptions all season.
In fact, here's a list of Super Bowl winning NFL quarterbacks who didn't manage that feat in their first year: Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, Eli Manning, Drew Brees and Brett Favre.
First, I hate the inclusion of Eli Manning in this list. Second, Drew Bledsoe did it. So did Marc Bulger (453). And Kevin Kolb (391). And Peyton Manning (302), and Peyton Manning (309), and Peyton Manning (357), and Peyton Manning (335). Wait. Hold on. Didn’t he just claim that Peyton had never done this? Let’s rewind…
Make no mistake about it, quarterbacks passing for 300 yards in their rookie season are rare, no matter who the NFL competition is.
In fact, here's a list of Super Bowl winning NFL quarterbacks who didn't manage that feat in their first year: Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, Eli Manning, Drew Brees and Brett Favre.
Not only did Peyton Manning do this, he is the all-time rookie leader in 300 yard passing games. Good lord. It’s one thing to make a stupid argument. It’s another thing entirely to be so lazy in researching your article that you get a counting stat about Peyton Manning not only wrong, but really really wrong. Opposite wrong. This article must be satire.
Here's a list of Super Bowl winning quarterbacks from the past 20 years who threw for 300 or more yards in their second career start.
That would be zero.
For the record, Peyton did it in his first career start. Also, it doesn’t really matter.
Not a one.
I mean, really? By the way, while I’ve been writing this I’ve been researching how rare 300 yard games by rookie QBs actually are. In 2002 it happened 6 times, 3 by Bulger, and 1 each by Joey Harrington, Patrick Ramsey, and Chad Hutchinson. Truly the elite of the QB world. By the way, Patrick Ramsey did it in his second career game. Did you do any research at all for this article?
And, oh by the way, Bronco fans, need a guy who also threw for 300 yards in the second-to-last game of his rookie season? Guy by the name of John Elway. Pretty good company, right?
John Elway – 15 year career, 5 Super Bowl appearances, 2 Wins, #1 overall pick, 9-time pro-bowler, multiple passing record holder, former MVP, great athlete, huge arm, quick release, extremely accurate.
Tim Tebow – controversial 1st-round pick, slow, ugly delivery, questions about his ability to make several NFL throws, has only played two games and completed just over 50% of his passes. Also, circumcises kids in the offseason.
Not similar.
Mine eyes have seen the Tebow and as much as it drives his haters crazy, you ain't seen nothing yet. But what you have seen is something the haters said you'd never see, Tebow with a win as a starting quarterback in the NFL.
No one said that. This column is nothing but a fanboy collection of straw men and non-facts. If it’s parody it commits the sin of not being funny, but I sure hope it’s parody, because if it’s not, it’s Bleacher Report bad.
This author is from Tennessee, which led me to believe this was satire as he probably isn't a big Florida fan and annoyed by Tebow hagiography, and he got stats about Peyton Manning just wrong, which a Tennessean probably shouldn't do. But then we have this on Twitter:
Hundreds of emailers told me I was a fool for believing in Tebow's NFL future for the past three years. Early validation for Tebow fans.
I'm really not sure, but I think it's terrible either way.
Look, I suppose there is some outside shot that Tim Tebow will succeed in the NFL. Maybe his big frame will let him hang in the pocket like Roethlisberger and allow his receivers extra time to get open (and extra time for his terribly slow delivery). Maybe he continues to be a weapon running the ball. It could happen.
But it probably won’t.
And anyone who thinks it will based on a few Brandon Lloyd circus catches against one of the worst pass defenses in the league is just delusional. Tebow completed just over half his passes for a lot of yards based on a few bombs that clicked. He had 1 TD and 1 pick, and added a rushing TD (although he only averaged 2.7 ypc). This was not some stellar performance, and pretending it was is just silly. Matt Cassel (201, 3 TDs, 0 picks) and David Garrard (342, 2 TDs, 0 picks) tore this team up. Mark Sanchez, who is apparently quite bad at football, looked like John Elway against Houston (315, 3TDs, 1 Pick). Donovan McNabb threw for 426 yards and a TD against them (no picks). Kerry Collins and Bruce Gradkowski put up games that were at least the equal of Tebow.
On Sunday, Tebow completed 55% of his passes. Only one other QB has completed as low a percentage as Tebow against the Texans this year: Rusty Smith. The Texans have allowed a QB to complete at least 65% of his passes on 8 occasions this year, and have allowed a QB to complete 70% of his passes 5 times. Tebow threw 1 pick and 1 TD. The only other QBs to not have a positive TD/Int ratio against the Texans are Bruce Gradkowski and Rusty Smith. The only other QBs to not throw at least 2 TD passes against the Texans are McNabb (who threw for 426 yards and no picks) and Rusty Smith.
It is difficult to oversell just how bad the Texans secondary was this year. That is what makes this piece of fanboy nonsense so completely terrible.
At the 2009 World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party, I bought and wore a teal and white, Jacksonville Jaguar colors, "Draft Tebow" T-shirt. The shirt had been for sale at a local Walgreen's -- perhaps the first time Walgreen's had been directly complicit in an NCAA violation -- and I wore it at the Georgia-Florida game to gauge fan reaction. (Read that column here.)
At that time Tebow and Florida were the defending national champions and how Tebow projected as an NFL quarterback was the single most-debated issue in the Southeastern Conference. Throw open the phone lines beneath the Mason-Dixon line and you could take calls for hours, everyone had an opinion.
Generally, the Tebow haters, and they were legion, would argue that his football glory was short-lived. That he could never win a football game in the NFL. That he would have to change positions to tight end or fullback. That Tim Tebow was a system quarterback who had no future at the position.
Just to distinguish myself as a "non-hater", I’d like to point something out. Tim Tebow’s college stats, in a vaccuum, absolutely look like they should translate to NFL success. He started a lot of games and he had a very high completion percentage. We’re not talking about a Kyle Boller-esque combine darling here.
The reasons that people are skeptical of Tebow are almost entirely based on scouting.
He has a funky delivery (and not in the good, Philip Rivers way), and he has trouble with the accuracy of certain throws. He was bigger than many college linebackers (but not professional linebackers), and he’s not terribly fast. And people overrate him because of his stupid moralizing. OK, so maybe I’m a bit of a hater.
Anyway, Tebow sort of reminds me of Ron Dayne. I think most people knew that Dayne wouldn’t succeed as a pro. He was just too slow, and his size advantage would only work in college. He had physical gifts, they just stopped working when the competition got better. Anyway…
I always argued otherwise, thinking back to the lasers I'd seen a freshman Tebow throwing in warm-ups at the Swamp in 2006. I had faith in Tebow's pro potential, argued that any team that didn't consider drafting him was foolish. And after I saw Tebow dismantle the Sugar Bowl record books en route to a 31-for-35 passing performance for 482 yards in a romp over Cincinnati. He also tossed in 51 yards rushing.
How could anyone have any doubts?
Cincinnati? Dude, have you seen the Big East lately? That Cinci team allowed Illinois to score 39 points. Pitt scored 44 on them. An unranked UConn team scored 45 on them. I would hope that Tim Tebow would at least put up better numbers than Juice Williams.
But Tebow's domination of the Sugar Bowl record book was in the future on that October day at the Cocktail Party. On that day Florida fans saw the Draft Tebow shirt and did the Gator chomp. They'd seen the Tebow, had faith in his ability to overcome any challenge.
These were in the ancient days before Tebow's statue was complete in Gainesville and before there was a plaque outside the wall featuring the speech Tebow gave after the loss to Ole Miss. "The Promise." But Georgia fans were not as enamored of Tebow. "He's a f---- fullback," screamed one fan. "He's a tight end," screamed another. "Tebow's a f---- p--y," catcalled an elegant female Bulldog.
Love him or hate him, already, Tebow was legend.
None of this has anything to do with Tebow’s ability to play in the pros. We know about all of this garbage. Announcers talked about nothing else during every Florida broadcast. The auditory fellatio directed at Tebow by announcers was also legend.
The question remained: would Tebow's game translate at the next level? Could he become a winning quarterback in the NFL? His jerseys flew off the shelf, becoming the best-selling jersey in the NFL. But Tebow stayed on the sideline. Then the head coach who'd risked his coaching future on drafting him, Josh McDaniels, was fired. At long last, Tebow took the field.
I would just like to point out that Kyle Orton actually played pretty well, especially early. And it’s quite possible that had the Broncos stayed healthy, and not been run by morons, or had some kind of defense, that Orton could very well have kept it up. Later, we will be talking about "300 yard games" for no good reason. Just keep in mind that Orton threw for over 300 yards in 4 of the Broncos first 5 games this year.
He lost his first game as a starter, against the Oakland Raiders,
8/16 for 138 yards and 1 TD. Half of those went to Brandon Lloyd.
but on Sunday Tebow took the field as a starter for a second time. And Tim Tebow vanquished the doubters who claimed he'd never be a winning quarterback at the NFL level.
By completing just over 50% of his passes against the worst secondary in the NFL. Well, I’m silenced. Oh, wait, no I’m not, because I watch NFL games and know about the Texans and follow Steph Stradley on Twitter.
Throwing for 308 yards against the Houston Texas, Tebow rallied his Denver Broncos team from a 17-0, second-half deficit and snatched a victory many never believed would come, a 24-23 triumph.
Really? Houston is basically famous for blowing second-half leads at this point. They’ve blown some truly amazing leads. They lost on a pick-6 in OT 2 weeks before this. 3 weeks ago they blew a big lead against the Eagles. In week 11 they let the Jets go all the way down the field with no timeouts and under a minute to go in only 2 plays to blow what should have been a sure victory.
The Texans do this all the time.
It wasn't just that Tebow won, it's the fact that his game clearly translates to the next level.
Did he improve his accuracy? Speed up his delivery?
Tebow's emotional embrace of the gridiron, his infectious enthusiasm, it's all there, working on an NFL sideline just like it worked in college. Just the way that his critics long contended it wouldn't. The anti-Tebow contingent was flat out wrong, but they won't admit it yet.
Oh. So…he’s a cheerleader. I’m glad Brandon Lloyd started playing better after Tebow started inspiring him. Oh, wait, he was awesome even when the kind of mopey-looking Neckbeard was QB. So, who is being enthused by Tebow exactly?
Already, the Tebow haters are retrenching their criticisms now that he is a winning quarterback in the NFL.
Because he won a game? Like, 1 game? So John Skelton is also a “Winning Quarterback”?
Tebow, in throwing for 300 yards in just his second start as a rookie, has managed a feat that neither Peyton nor Eli Manning could accomplish in their rookie seasons.
Eli Manning, nice QB, not that great. Peyton Manning was drafted #1 overall. When you are drafted #1 overall the team that drafts you is terrible as a rule (barring a trade, I suppose). Also, the Texans secondary doesn’t come around very often, and as previously pointed out, everyone has torched them. Also, raw yardage is a stupid measure.
There must be a reason why they were wrong. The Tebow haters are circling, nervous, still unwilling to give up the hateful fight. They point to the Houston Texans' pass defense, currently ranked 32nd in the league.
Uhm..yes. Though I’m not sure last really captures their terribleness completely. I mean, you can’t be worse than 32nd. You can’t fall off the floor, as they say.
Want to read a whole bunch of straw man arguments all in a row?
The same people who said that Tebow would never win an NFL game,
Basically, no one said this. Tons of awful QBs have “won” NFL games.
wring their hands and argue that this is too small of a sample size to prove anything.
Yes, one game is too small of a sample size to prove anything. That is correct. But they will not “wring their hands” as they are correct.
And even if it does prove anything, the Texans are awful. So what, you know, if the Broncos are also awful. That's why the Texans were favored to win this game.
No , no, no. The Texans are not awful. The Texans’ offense is very good. This is why the Texans are in almost every game they play. Their defense, however, is so bad that even Tim Tebow looked OK against it.
Of course, those Tebow haters have already been proven wrong so now they have to move their targets, have to argue that Tebow can't do it again.
Now I'm not really not sure if this is parody or not. I’m not that acquainted with Clay Travis's writing, but this sounds so meatball-y that it is difficult to believe it was published. Actually, I take that back. This is the kind of tripe I might expect from an old-timey columnist, so I guess my main surprise is that an online magazine published this. It might be Tebow-baiting.
When he does, they'll argue that he can't beat a team with a winning record, that he can't beat a 3-4 defense, that he can't win a playoff game, that he can't win a Super Bowl. You get the picture. Tebow haters gonna hate. And keep shifting the argument every time Tebow proves them wrong. Tebow haters will begin every sentence with, "Yeah, but..."
You did see his game against the Raiders last week, right? Where he completed 8 passes? And it was only the Raiders. I mean, we’re dealing with a small sample size here to start, the least you could do is not ignore half of the sample size.
But every time they adjust their argument Tebow moves further down the field, powering through his haters like they stood between him and the goal line. Already the college debate that lasted for three years -- could Tebow win in the NFL?-- has shifted to, how many games can Tebow win in the NFL? The answer? A ton. Make no mistake about it, quarterbacks passing for 300 yards in their rookie season are rare, no matter who the NFL competition is.
This is not true, and it is not true that 300 yard games against the Texans are rare. And “300 yards” is one of those annoying, arbitrary round number bench marks. Sticking to the 300 yard thing ignores that fact that Tebow wasn’t very accurate in this game, and was actually picked off by a defense that only had 8 non-Rusty interceptions all season.
In fact, here's a list of Super Bowl winning NFL quarterbacks who didn't manage that feat in their first year: Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, Eli Manning, Drew Brees and Brett Favre.
First, I hate the inclusion of Eli Manning in this list. Second, Drew Bledsoe did it. So did Marc Bulger (453). And Kevin Kolb (391). And Peyton Manning (302), and Peyton Manning (309), and Peyton Manning (357), and Peyton Manning (335). Wait. Hold on. Didn’t he just claim that Peyton had never done this? Let’s rewind…
Make no mistake about it, quarterbacks passing for 300 yards in their rookie season are rare, no matter who the NFL competition is.
In fact, here's a list of Super Bowl winning NFL quarterbacks who didn't manage that feat in their first year: Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, Eli Manning, Drew Brees and Brett Favre.
Not only did Peyton Manning do this, he is the all-time rookie leader in 300 yard passing games. Good lord. It’s one thing to make a stupid argument. It’s another thing entirely to be so lazy in researching your article that you get a counting stat about Peyton Manning not only wrong, but really really wrong. Opposite wrong. This article must be satire.
Here's a list of Super Bowl winning quarterbacks from the past 20 years who threw for 300 or more yards in their second career start.
That would be zero.
For the record, Peyton did it in his first career start. Also, it doesn’t really matter.
Not a one.
I mean, really? By the way, while I’ve been writing this I’ve been researching how rare 300 yard games by rookie QBs actually are. In 2002 it happened 6 times, 3 by Bulger, and 1 each by Joey Harrington, Patrick Ramsey, and Chad Hutchinson. Truly the elite of the QB world. By the way, Patrick Ramsey did it in his second career game. Did you do any research at all for this article?
And, oh by the way, Bronco fans, need a guy who also threw for 300 yards in the second-to-last game of his rookie season? Guy by the name of John Elway. Pretty good company, right?
John Elway – 15 year career, 5 Super Bowl appearances, 2 Wins, #1 overall pick, 9-time pro-bowler, multiple passing record holder, former MVP, great athlete, huge arm, quick release, extremely accurate.
Tim Tebow – controversial 1st-round pick, slow, ugly delivery, questions about his ability to make several NFL throws, has only played two games and completed just over 50% of his passes. Also, circumcises kids in the offseason.
Not similar.
Mine eyes have seen the Tebow and as much as it drives his haters crazy, you ain't seen nothing yet. But what you have seen is something the haters said you'd never see, Tebow with a win as a starting quarterback in the NFL.
No one said that. This column is nothing but a fanboy collection of straw men and non-facts. If it’s parody it commits the sin of not being funny, but I sure hope it’s parody, because if it’s not, it’s Bleacher Report bad.
This author is from Tennessee, which led me to believe this was satire as he probably isn't a big Florida fan and annoyed by Tebow hagiography, and he got stats about Peyton Manning just wrong, which a Tennessean probably shouldn't do. But then we have this on Twitter:
Hundreds of emailers told me I was a fool for believing in Tebow's NFL future for the past three years. Early validation for Tebow fans.
I'm really not sure, but I think it's terrible either way.
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Quote of the Day
From Tango:
I couldn't agree more.
Note to mothers: Craig Counsell throws with his right hand and hits from the left side. That’s exactly how you should bring up your kids.
I couldn't agree more.
Monday, December 20, 2010
When the Packers lost the game
Yes, the offensive lineman running for 71 yards without being touched was awful and embarrassing, but they lost the game here:
4-1-NE 1 (13:52) 2-M.Crosby 19 yard field goal is GOOD, Center-61-B.Goode, Holder-8-T.Masthay.
I hate 19 yard FGs. Unless you are trailing by 2 or less and time is running out, they're always a bad idea, but this was a particularly bad decision. I'll never understand why coaches do not think in terms of possessions. Being up by 7 is good. Being up by 9 or more is great. When your opponent needs two offensive possession to beat you instead of one, you are far more likely to win the game.
Being up by 10 on the Pats is simply far more valuable than being up by 6, and it was well worth the risk. Moreover, even if the Packers were stopped the Pats likely could not have gone the length of the field starting from the 1.
That was a terrible decision, and cost them the game as much as anything.
4-1-NE 1 (13:52) 2-M.Crosby 19 yard field goal is GOOD, Center-61-B.Goode, Holder-8-T.Masthay.
I hate 19 yard FGs. Unless you are trailing by 2 or less and time is running out, they're always a bad idea, but this was a particularly bad decision. I'll never understand why coaches do not think in terms of possessions. Being up by 7 is good. Being up by 9 or more is great. When your opponent needs two offensive possession to beat you instead of one, you are far more likely to win the game.
Being up by 10 on the Pats is simply far more valuable than being up by 6, and it was well worth the risk. Moreover, even if the Packers were stopped the Pats likely could not have gone the length of the field starting from the 1.
That was a terrible decision, and cost them the game as much as anything.
Meet Your New (Real) Ace
These are the greatest interviews with an athlete I have ever heard. It's not even close. His reaction to the Pitt/Anniston break up reminds me of my reaction to Zack and Kelly.
Here is a great thread by Royals fans combining his best quotes.
(After searching for these interviews I realized I first heard them on Deadspin back in 2007. Man, that site really used to be a less embarrassing place).
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Greinke
It appears that Zach Greinke is now a Brewer. Still not confirmed, and not sure on the details. My opinion on the deal hinges greatly on whether Jake Odorizzi was included.
Paul Edit
After thinking it over, screw Odorizzi. Love the deal. Love it.
ESK edit: deal confirmed
Brewers get: Zack Greinke, Yuniesky Betancourt, $2 million to buy out Betancourt
Royals get: Cain, Escobar, Odorizzi, Jeffress (PTBN instead of Jeffress)
I'm smitten
Paul Edit
After thinking it over, screw Odorizzi. Love the deal. Love it.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
The Bears Continued Luck
If the Bears win on Monday, and if Joe Webb starts for the Vikings, the Bears will have 5 of their ten wins against the following backup (or worse) QBs:
Shaun Hill
Jimmy Clausen
Tyler Thigpen
Drew Stanton
Joe Webb
Shaun Hill
Jimmy Clausen
Tyler Thigpen
Drew Stanton
Joe Webb
Joe Webb
For the Packers to have a shot at winning the North, the Vikings must beat the Bears this week on Monday Night. Therefore, it is not good that the Vikings are likely to start a player I have literally never heard of before.
Sins Committed by Mike, Mike, and Mark Schlereth this morning:
1. Claiming that a high number of rushing attempts causes your team to win. (Check)
2. Blaming Mark Sanchez’s struggles on bad weather. (Check)
3. Going on ad nauseum about the Jets. (Check)
4. Claiming that “After Aaron Rodgers went out last week the offense was anemic”. (Check, and while technically true, ignored the fact that it was just as bad before he went out.)
5. Claimed that a team needs to “find its identity” to be good. I don’t know what that means. (Check)
6. Showtunes, sung by the Mikes. (Check)
7. Citing Darius Rucker's approval of said showtunes. (Check)
8. Misstatement of NFC North playoff scenario. (Check – Claim that a Packers loss eliminates them from contention. This is only true if the Bears win as well.)
9. Advertisements now integrated into the show, accompanied by annoying background drum machine. (Check)
10. Mark Schlereth – “I don’t have much use for statistics, but the one I like to look at is rush attempts”. (Check. And Good Lord.)
I think they made it worse. I did not think it was possible. And this didn’t even feature Ditka.
2. Blaming Mark Sanchez’s struggles on bad weather. (Check)
3. Going on ad nauseum about the Jets. (Check)
4. Claiming that “After Aaron Rodgers went out last week the offense was anemic”. (Check, and while technically true, ignored the fact that it was just as bad before he went out.)
5. Claimed that a team needs to “find its identity” to be good. I don’t know what that means. (Check)
6. Showtunes, sung by the Mikes. (Check)
7. Citing Darius Rucker's approval of said showtunes. (Check)
8. Misstatement of NFC North playoff scenario. (Check – Claim that a Packers loss eliminates them from contention. This is only true if the Bears win as well.)
9. Advertisements now integrated into the show, accompanied by annoying background drum machine. (Check)
10. Mark Schlereth – “I don’t have much use for statistics, but the one I like to look at is rush attempts”. (Check. And Good Lord.)
I think they made it worse. I did not think it was possible. And this didn’t even feature Ditka.
Monday, December 13, 2010
They Are Legend. Legendarily Stupid.
The Legends
The Leaders
As Moe the bartender once said, that's the worst name I ever heard.
ESK (I didn't want to make a new post, but this sums up my thoughts on the names, the logo and the whole shebang):
Can the Packers still make the playoffs?
Probably not, but let’s take a look at what needs to shake out, what you need to root for, etc.
First and foremost, you absolutely want the Vikings to beat the Giants tonight. Doing so would create a 3-way tie for the last wild card spot between GB, TB, and the Giants. Of those teams, the Packers have the worst Conference record but I doubt that will end up mattering for a few reasons:
1. The Packers still play against the Giants, so that tiebreaker will end up being head to head.
2. To make the playoffs I figure the Packers can at maximum lose one more game (and that’s a stretch) and that game would have to be an out of division game to the Patriots.
3. Every remaining Bucs game is against the NFC. The Bucs are 6-3 and the Packers are 6-4. I believe the Pack will have to win all of their remaining conference games to make the playoffs (8-4) and any Bucs loss will put them in a tie for that tiebreaker. If the Bucs can win out, they will win the tiebreaker.
The Packers have 2 possible ways to get into the playoffs.
1.Catch the Bears.
2.Win the Wild Card.
1. Catch the Bears
The Bears sit a game up on the Packers with a head-to-head win in their possession. In order to catch the Bears it is extremely likely that the Packers will have to win the head to head matchup, and in the event that they end up in a tie, the Bears will still probably win the tiebreaker. Why? Division record. The Packers currently sit at 3-2 within the division with 1 game left (against the Bears). The Bears are 4-0 with 2 games left (next week at Minnesota if they can fix their stadium in time, and against the Packers). If the Bears beat Minnesota next week they effectively lock up the tiebreaker. This means that to win the division, the Packers will have to win one more game than the Bears, and if the Bears beat Minnesota, that would meant the Packers would have to, at minimum, go 11-5.
In short, if the Bears win at Minnesota next week, and the Packers lose in Foxboro next week (like everyone has for the last 20 consecutive games or so), the Bears will wrap up the division. That is exceedingly likely to happen.
If the Bears lose next week things become much more plausible. If you assume an equally (at least) plausible GB loss to New England, that would put the Bears at 9-5 and the Packers at 8-6 with 2 games to play. In this scenario a Packer win against Chicago would put the teams even in the first 2 tiebreakers moving us to common games. The Packers and Bears have 12 games in common, and each team is currently 7-3 in those games with 2 yet to play. For the Bears, those games are Minnesota and the NYJ. For the Pack it’s New England and the Giants. If you will recall, to even make this scenario plausible we had to assume a Bear loss to Minnesota, and if the Packers somehow did manage to force a tie in this scenario, they probably win with either the common opponents tiebreaker or the Conference Record tiebreaker. Of course beating the Giants is no easy task and that game can also make this whole thing moot.
If the Vikings can somehow pull their game out next week, we’ll reexamine further, but if the Bears win it’s basically over.
2. The Wild Card.
This whole analysis is probably academic for one simple reason. The Packers, a team that just lost to the Detroit Lions and did not look good doing it, have an extremely difficult final three games and they have to win a high percentage of those games, and possibly all of them.
The Saints basically have the 1st Wild Card slot locked up, and should they happen to catch Atlanta, then Atlanta would similarly have it locked up. There are 4 teams in play for the final Wild Card spot; whoever does not win the NFC East (Eagles of Giants), the Bucs, and the Packers. The Giants have yet to play this week @Minnesota/Detroit, and sit ½ game up at 8-4. After the game tonight, they will finish up at home against Philly, and then on the road at GB and @Washington. Green Bay will almost certainly need to win the head-to-head matchup with the Giants to have any chance at the wild card both because they need the win, and probably, the tiebreaker.
Tampa Bay escaped this weekend on a missed extra point by the Redskins. They have a relatively easy schedule at home against Detroit, at home against Seattle, and @ New Orleans. It is exceedingly likely that New Orleans will have their spot locked up in week 17 and give Tampa a healthy dose of Chase Daniels.
One thing the Packers do have going for them is their win over the Eagles. Should the Giants beat Minnesota tonight and Philly next week, they will put the Eagles into the Wild Card mix, where the Packers already own the head-to-head tiebreaker.
The Packers appear to have the most difficult road to the playoffs of these four teams. One strange thing: Minnesota will play a prominent role no matter what. They play the Giants tonight, the Bears next week, and the Eagles in week 16. The Packers are in the strange position of hoping for a 3-game Viking winning streak to end the season.
Without doing any math of any kind, I’d put the Packers’ odds of making the playoffs at something around 25%. Probably a bit worse. Still, stranger things have happened.
First and foremost, you absolutely want the Vikings to beat the Giants tonight. Doing so would create a 3-way tie for the last wild card spot between GB, TB, and the Giants. Of those teams, the Packers have the worst Conference record but I doubt that will end up mattering for a few reasons:
1. The Packers still play against the Giants, so that tiebreaker will end up being head to head.
2. To make the playoffs I figure the Packers can at maximum lose one more game (and that’s a stretch) and that game would have to be an out of division game to the Patriots.
3. Every remaining Bucs game is against the NFC. The Bucs are 6-3 and the Packers are 6-4. I believe the Pack will have to win all of their remaining conference games to make the playoffs (8-4) and any Bucs loss will put them in a tie for that tiebreaker. If the Bucs can win out, they will win the tiebreaker.
The Packers have 2 possible ways to get into the playoffs.
1.Catch the Bears.
2.Win the Wild Card.
1. Catch the Bears
The Bears sit a game up on the Packers with a head-to-head win in their possession. In order to catch the Bears it is extremely likely that the Packers will have to win the head to head matchup, and in the event that they end up in a tie, the Bears will still probably win the tiebreaker. Why? Division record. The Packers currently sit at 3-2 within the division with 1 game left (against the Bears). The Bears are 4-0 with 2 games left (next week at Minnesota if they can fix their stadium in time, and against the Packers). If the Bears beat Minnesota next week they effectively lock up the tiebreaker. This means that to win the division, the Packers will have to win one more game than the Bears, and if the Bears beat Minnesota, that would meant the Packers would have to, at minimum, go 11-5.
In short, if the Bears win at Minnesota next week, and the Packers lose in Foxboro next week (like everyone has for the last 20 consecutive games or so), the Bears will wrap up the division. That is exceedingly likely to happen.
If the Bears lose next week things become much more plausible. If you assume an equally (at least) plausible GB loss to New England, that would put the Bears at 9-5 and the Packers at 8-6 with 2 games to play. In this scenario a Packer win against Chicago would put the teams even in the first 2 tiebreakers moving us to common games. The Packers and Bears have 12 games in common, and each team is currently 7-3 in those games with 2 yet to play. For the Bears, those games are Minnesota and the NYJ. For the Pack it’s New England and the Giants. If you will recall, to even make this scenario plausible we had to assume a Bear loss to Minnesota, and if the Packers somehow did manage to force a tie in this scenario, they probably win with either the common opponents tiebreaker or the Conference Record tiebreaker. Of course beating the Giants is no easy task and that game can also make this whole thing moot.
If the Vikings can somehow pull their game out next week, we’ll reexamine further, but if the Bears win it’s basically over.
2. The Wild Card.
This whole analysis is probably academic for one simple reason. The Packers, a team that just lost to the Detroit Lions and did not look good doing it, have an extremely difficult final three games and they have to win a high percentage of those games, and possibly all of them.
The Saints basically have the 1st Wild Card slot locked up, and should they happen to catch Atlanta, then Atlanta would similarly have it locked up. There are 4 teams in play for the final Wild Card spot; whoever does not win the NFC East (Eagles of Giants), the Bucs, and the Packers. The Giants have yet to play this week @Minnesota/Detroit, and sit ½ game up at 8-4. After the game tonight, they will finish up at home against Philly, and then on the road at GB and @Washington. Green Bay will almost certainly need to win the head-to-head matchup with the Giants to have any chance at the wild card both because they need the win, and probably, the tiebreaker.
Tampa Bay escaped this weekend on a missed extra point by the Redskins. They have a relatively easy schedule at home against Detroit, at home against Seattle, and @ New Orleans. It is exceedingly likely that New Orleans will have their spot locked up in week 17 and give Tampa a healthy dose of Chase Daniels.
One thing the Packers do have going for them is their win over the Eagles. Should the Giants beat Minnesota tonight and Philly next week, they will put the Eagles into the Wild Card mix, where the Packers already own the head-to-head tiebreaker.
The Packers appear to have the most difficult road to the playoffs of these four teams. One strange thing: Minnesota will play a prominent role no matter what. They play the Giants tonight, the Bears next week, and the Eagles in week 16. The Packers are in the strange position of hoping for a 3-game Viking winning streak to end the season.
Without doing any math of any kind, I’d put the Packers’ odds of making the playoffs at something around 25%. Probably a bit worse. Still, stranger things have happened.
Monday, December 6, 2010
The classic win-win
What is coming over me? I sat in front of twitter, various message boards, the urinal's web site, email clients and my phone...all waiting to praise Doug Melvin? This can't be true. My desire to praise the mustache even drew my attention away for brief moments from one of the best football games of the year. (Polamalu showing he's a God awful defensive back but a stunning linebacker yet again).
The deal (as of now):
Toronto gets: Brett Lawrie
Milwaukee gets: Shaun Marcum
I love the deal. I know many, many people are high on Lawrie but honestly, the experts really aren't. After last season most who have seen him play agree Lawrie is destined for a corner spot. As a 2B Lawrie has an absolute ton of upside and his bat makes him a clear blue chipper. As a corner outfielder? I don't see it. A .795 OPS at the AA level isn't something to get me worked up from a corner outfielder. His K rate is over 20% and he doesn't hit for power. It could be that I'm naturally sand bagging him because I like the deal, but I really don't see a whole lot there to get me excited, assuming his glove moves him to right. BrewerFan.net loved him in September (seemingly suggesting trading Weeks or Hart to clear room for him).
As to Marcum, find me a glaring issue? He's back from Tommy John (an injury unlikely to recur and a surgery that restores past durability), was playing in the AL bEast for a team in contention (if that sort of thing matters to you), was considered the team ace (pitched opening day) and pitched well, posting a better WHIP than Gallardo. His 3.5 WAR, when you assume he's replacing someone below replacement level, is a massive upgrade. I've read suggestions that hoping he'll put up similar numbers is wishful thinking, but he'll come to Milwaukee without any of the pressures he had in Toronto and more importantly, without having to face the Yankees or Red Sox. But wait, there is more....the Brewers control him for at least two more seasons. I think Jack Moore in his post at FanGraphs sums it up well:
With Lawrie coming off a very impressive .361 wOBA season as a 20 year old at AA Huntsville, it’s hard to imagine his value at a higher point in the near future. The Brewers had a large roster hole to fill, and due to the concerns about Lawrie’s position, Milwaukee GM Doug Melvin decided to capitalize on Lawrie’s high prospect stock. By most accounts, this deal was fair to both sides. The Brewers filled a need and the Jays dealt from a position of surplus. The Brewers win in the short term, and, if Lawrie develops in accordance to his top prospect status, the Jays should enjoy a solid long term return.
So where does the rotation fall? I'm guessing it will look like Gallardo, Wolf, Marcum, Rogers, Narveson. The Brewers might give Jeffress and others a shot to compete for that last spot in the Spring and I expect Melvin to bring in some crafty, assy Veteran innings eater to foul the whole thing up...
Sidenote, the notorious Brewer hater Jon Heyman thinks this is a lousy deal for the Brewers. I'm stunned.
Friday, December 3, 2010
First Mock Draft (that I've seen)
http://www.draftcountdown.com/sub/Mock-Draft-B.php
Couple things:
1. Von Miller would be an excellent pick for the Packers. I know everyone in the world is going to be screaming for a running back, but there isn't a lot of first round talent at the position. A 3-4 defense with two pass rushers on the outside with the d-back abilities of Williams, Collins and Woodson? Goodness can you imagine what a genius like Capers could cook up (please don't leave, Dom).
2. TWO BADGERS PROJECTED FIRST ROUND!......please don't leave JJ.
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